Tuesday, June 17, 2008

The Ball Is Rolling

Yesterday my main GI called me to talk about the polyps in my duodenum and to tell me we "need to get the ball rolling". He said he would schedule a few appointments for me. Well damn. They called me this morning wanting to know if I could be there this afternoon. Yeah I work, so that was a no. But I am going in on Friday to meet with the surgeon who will be working on my duodenum.

So weird that I have a 'team' of doctors working on me. Previously I was a relatively healthy person (minus the poop problems). How did I go from being a healthy person to a person with a team of doctors? Sometimes it feels like they have the wrong person. Are we sure that was my colon you were looking at? I look healthy on the outside, so how can I be so sick on the inside? Its almost like my body let me down. Hey I've been keeping up my end of the bargain here! I try and eat healthy, exercise, get plenty of fiber, water, vitamins, organic. . . but then my body didn't keep its end of the bargain.

I am realizing that is a good thing next week is my last week of work. First of it is really hard to be a nanny and have all these last minute appointments. And secondly all the stress of this has shot my nerves. I feel really bad, but I have very little patience with the kids now. A nanny needs to have nerves of steel, but mine are frayed to all hell.

On that note I need to rest before the kiddies wake up. If anything I have been extremely fatigued lately.


Maribeth said...

Thanks for the update Step. The post below explains a lot and is helpful to understand what you are going through - at least physically.

Em said...

Steph, you have a blog!

I think you have been through just about enough this year, and I hope that after your surgeries you are able to relax a little bit.

Hang in there, buddy. You have lots of people praying for you!

Tim & Kate said...

Steph, thanks for keeping us updated.

Just wanted to let you know that you are in my prayers. Let me know if you need anything!

Christina said...

i agree with maribeth. these posts really explain what's going on with your body and i bet it helps to write about it to sort things out in your mind. thinking of you!

Craig said...

Frankly this idea of blogging about your condition is quite brave, yet helpful for those of us who care about you. I hope and pray that things work out well for you. From a 60 year old perspective any serious surgery's are hard to deal with so hopefully you can have a beer every now and then and kick back and try and chill!!

Aunt Deb and Family said...

Stephanie. A Blog, how interesting! I would never have thought of this. I am impressed with myself that I have figured out how to comment you. Reading your thoughts and fears make me feel like I am right there with you. Tho I am not physically with you, you are on my mind everyday. Thanks for the blog. God Bless and keep your chin up girlie! Much love, Aunt Deb

aunt colleen said...

Steph,I am so glad to be able to hear your thoughts; you have been in ours and in our prayers. It's good to know you are surrounded by a team (there and here)you deserve it.

Becca said...

okay, since I just found you, I'm gonna go and comment on ALL your posts..hehehe.
Anywho, not sure if you've read stuff that I first posted on my blog (when I started it) but this was one of the biggest lumps for me to swallow.
I literaly remember saying to someone "My body betrayed me"
And still to this day I sometimes have these internal dialogues with my body, or parts of my body (damn that kooky meditation book I read before surgery).
These dialogues sometimes go "what the hell is wrong with you, *insert organ name here*?! I'm doing all I can here and you're just slacking off. This is unacceptable performance, we're gonna have to reevaluate this working relationship."
(okay...sometimes I just get plain silly with it.)
Anywho, not sure if it's something we as newly diagnosed peeps will ever adjust to. And in some ways I don't want to fully adjust to the thought of being a 'patient' or someone with 'limitations'.